The Echo

No. 1-2004         JANUARY      Santee, CA

The Monthly Newsletter of:

Carlton Hills Evangelical Lutheran Church

9735 Halberns Blvd., Santee, CA  92071

Voice/Fax: (619) 448-1888




Carlton Hills Evangelical Lutheran Church Council and Staff

Sue Lisowsky


Laura Vaughan

Vice President

Marie Freeman


Charlotte Arthurton

Financial Secretary

Deanna Sampson


Leslie Atkins


Tom Insel


Janice Davis


Bill Thomas


Darrel Timan

Christian Education

Lauri O’Neil

Director, Preschool

Pr. Molly Knutson-Keller

SDSU Lutheran Campus Pastor

Our Mission Statement:

Strengthen Faith in Christ

Enlarge our Hearts

Energize for Mission

Stretch our Minds

Mark Neuhaus


Jan Neuhaus

Music Director

Marsha Hamilton


Kathy Norris

Principal, Day School


Parish Education

Deanna Sampson

School Bookkeeper

Leslie Atkins

Jennifer Brown

Delores Ryden

Mutual Support

Committee Members

Ed Teichner


Stephens Ministry

Mary Thomas

Prayer Chain, 334-6457

Julie & Terry Borchard

L.B.T. Missionaries


After The Angels Have Gone

Christmas is over. The angels have gone, and we know it. The lights are out, the tree down, the packages opened, the cookies eaten. It’s back to life as usual, with winter and the January! February blues stretching before us. No angels. No excitement. Some of us face sickness and suffering, and some stand face-to-face with death. Others face the long winter months feeling very lonely. Now, it is back to the job, or back to school. Getting up early, and working hard, and being tired, and wondering where the energy will come from to get through the day and the week.

Mark’s gospel (7:24-27) includes a poignant, painful line: “the winds blew and beat against the house, and it fell—and great was its fall!” Christmas is over, but God is at work, preparing us for those times when the difficult winds pound us. God is at work strengthening our f6undations, and Christ desires to be the cornerstone of our lives.

We enter a new year with four responses. All will help to build our spiritual homes into the spiritual dwelling that God had in mind when we were created.

First: Do the hard work of building. When the winds blow, following Christ is hard work. Ask your spouse or friend to pray with you. . . or tell that young person you love him/her and always will. . . no matter what.

Second: Be far-sighted. Do not trade a long- term blessing for a short-term pleasure.

Third: Listen—to hear the Lord’s voice. We cannot hear if we are not listening.

Fourth: Act on the things that God has called us to do. Don’t know what God wants you to do? Not feeling equipped? I am convinced that God doesn’t call the unequipped; I am convinced that God doesn’t call the equipped. God equips the called. God is calling you today. He is looking for willing hearts and lives.

Yes, Christmas is over, but Christ is still here. Be sure Christ is the cornerstone, the rock on which you build your life.

Interim Pastors to Serve CHLC

The congregational council has approved the Bishop’s recommendation that Pastor Frank Gearhart and Pastor Rick Schowalter serve during the Interim at CHLC.  Pr Frank will serve 3/4 time and Pr Rick 1/4 time.  This will allow the specialized ministry of youth and children’s ministry to go forward under the leadership of Pr Rick who is also Director of Youth Leadership for our entire Pacifica Synod.  Additionally, Pr Rick will lend his youth ministry skills in teaching confirmation, 1st communion classes, and chapel at the school.  Welcome Pastor Rick.


Pastor Frank will serve the congregation in all other capacities such as leading worship (except for every 6th Sunday when Pr Rick preaches), devote 20 hours a week to pastoral concerns, perform pastoral acts, teach adult education, visit members and prospective members, work with council and transition team and committees, account to the Bishop on the progress of Interim Pastoral ministry and carry out other congregational needs as 3/4 time ministry allows.


There are seven specific goals of our Intentional Interim Ministry, which are part of Pr Frank’s areas of leadership:

1.   To maintain the viability of the congregation

2.   To help resolve feelings of grief over the death of Pastor Mark

3.   To reinforce the ministry of the laity

4.   To deal with special needs of our congregation

5.   To emphasize fellowship and reconciliation with one another

6.   To strengthen our ties with Synod and the Church-at-large

7.     To increase the potential for a fruitful ministry under the next regularly-called pastor


Pastor Frank Gearhart

Pastor Frank has served as an ordained minister of the ELCA for 39 years.  He grew up in Iowa and moved in California with his parents in 1956.  After ordination he served six congregation in Southern California including 12 years at Bethlehem, Encinitas, and 14 years at First Lutheran, Redlands, with shorter pastorates at Templeton-Atascadero, Santa Maria, Orange, and retired from Christ Lutheran, Pacific Beach in 1999.  Since retirement Pastor Frank has briefly served three congregations facing pastoral crisis including St. Luke’s, La Mesa, Calvary, Del Mar, and St. Peter’s by the Sea in Point Loma.

Together with his wife Jane, dog Shadrach, and cat Lucy, Pr Frank lives in So Carlsbad (2406 La Plancha Ln.  Carlsbad 92009).  Their three children are grown with Anna, her husband Leif and three children Linnea, Elise, and Mattias living in Oxnard, Jennifer living in San Francisco, and Paul living in Sweden.  Paul is a “starving art student” going to glass making school at Orrefors, Sweden.

The 3/4 time ministry at CHLC will include working at home Mondays, being at CHLC Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays 10am-7pm, and Sunday mornings, off Friday and Saturday.  That schedule will be adjusted to accommodate parish schedules.

Pr Frank is a graduate of Pacific Lutheran University, Tacoma WA, Lutheran School of Theology – Chicago, spent 6 weeks in the Holy Land on a study seminar and is a California license Marriage, Family Therapist.  Jane graduated from Cal State San Bernardino with a math major and worked for T.R.W. at Norton Air Force Base, and Health Data Sciences in San Bernardino prior to retirement.  We look forward to meeting and getting to know the wonderful people at CHLC.

The City of Santee invited the Neuhaus Family to accept a certificate of adjournment at the December 17th City Council meeting. Jan, Erin, Andrew and Pastor Mark’s parents were there for the presentation.


Introducing a Quarter Time Pastor

 for CHLC:

Pastor Rick Schowalter


Carlton Hills Evangelical Lutheran Church has hired Pastor Rick Schowalter as a quarter time pastor to assist Pastor Gearhart who will be the interim pastor on a three quarter time basis.  Pastor Rick will have the following duties as presented to the church council at Carlton Hills at their December meeting:


·        The employment is meant to take place beginning January 1, 2004 and will call for 12 hours of service per week

·        Office hours every Monday from 9:00am-Noon

·        Wednesday evening program to include a church-wide dinner from 6:10pm-6:30pm, a children’s program from 6:30pm-7:30pm and Confirmation from 7:30-8:30pm

·        First Communion Instruction

·        Preaching every 6th Sunday

·        Youth group (Hi-Youth) participation and support

·        Retreats, Trips and Camps for children and youth

·        On call for pastoral care especially when Pastor Gearhart is not available or he is having a day off

·        Vacation fill-in for Pastor Gearhart

·        Pastoral leadership for the school especially with chapel participation

The new program being offered will be the Wednesday evening program and more information about this program will soon be made available.  This program is a part of Pastor Rick’s ministry experience and has had great success in many locations.  The programming is in keeping with the direction the church has set over the past several months.  The program includes a dinner for everyone at Carlton Hills.  Singles and families are encouraged to attend.  The children’s program following the dinner is called God’s Gifts.  It is meant to be a program for children K-6th grade and is largely a take-home lesson where a Bible story and memory verses are learned at home and children are given credit for their work at God’s Gifts where they earn prizes, recognition, awards and a trip at the end of two ten- week sessions each year.

The following is a brief outline of Rick’s ministry experience, education and training.

Grew up in Minnesota and graduated from Gustavus Adolphus College, St. Peter Minnesota

Graduated from Luther Seminary in Minneapolis with a Master of Divinity Degree and later would earn a Doctor of Ministry degree

Served 3 previous congregations as a youth and family pastor: Zion Lutheran in Anoka, Minnesota for 6 years, St. Luke’s Lutheran in Bloomington Minnesota for 6 years and Shepherd of the Valley Lutheran in Phoenix, Arizona for 10 years

Currently is the solo pastor at Hope Lutheran in San Diego and Director of Youth Ministry Leadership for the Pacifica Synod.

Served the Grand Canyon Synod as Director of Youth Ministry Leadership, is currently the director of the Southwest Youth Ministry Certification Network (SYMCN) and has been on the board of Lutheran Youth Encounter

Active with the Cursillo retreat everywhere he has served and the youth versions of this retreat know by different names in different parts of the country

Authored a book edited by Lyle Schaller entitled “Igniting A New Generation of Believers”, Abingdon Press, 1995

Pastor Rick is married and has three daughters.  His wife Deby is a Chiropractor and works for a chiropractic HMO as a senior case manager in San Diego.  His oldest daughter, Beth is married and studying to be a high school guidance counselor at Northern Arizona University.  His middle daughter, Rachel is in a PhD program doing Bio Medical Research at the University of Kentucky and his youngest daughter Naomi is a junior at Grossmont High School in El Cajon.

The Grief Journey

Someone you love has died.  You are beginning a journey that is often frightening, painful, and lonely.  No words, written or spoken, can take away the pain you feel.  Perhaps someone has already said, “In time, you’ll feel better.”  Actually, time alone has nothing to do with healing.  To heal, you must be willing to learn about and understand the grief process.


As scary as this may sound, you will never “get over” your grief.  Instead you will learn to live with it.  This does not mean you will never be happy again.  If you allow yourself the time and compassion to mourn, if you truly work through your grief, you will heal.



Because grief is different for every person it is hard to predict what you will feel in the weeks and months ahead.  While your grief is unique, it might help you to understand some of the most common emotions associated with grief.

¨     Shock – dazed, stunned.  This is nature’s way of protecting you from an overwhelming reality.  Stomach pains, heart palpitations, crying hysterically, screaming angrily or even laughing.  These behaviors help you survive during this extra ordinarily difficult time.

¨     Confusion – even ongoing.  Thoughts may be disconnected, your mind may race, you may sense the dead person’s presence or have fleeting glimpses of the person across the room.  This is very common and very normal – they are “memory pictures.”

¨     Anxiety.  As your head and heart begin to miss the person who died, you may naturally feel anxious.  You may doubt your ability to survive, feel anxious about everyday realities such as work or finances.  You may panic.

¨     Anger and its cousins hate, blame, resentment, rage, and jealousy are normal responses.  With loss comes the desire to protest.  Explosive emotions provide the vehicle to do so.  We have two avenues of expressing these emotions:  outward or inward.  The outward avenue leads to healing:  the inward does not.  Critical to your healing is finding someone who does not judge you but allows you to feel whatever you feel.

¨     Guilt.  We naturally consider the “If-onlys.”  Remember thinking is logical, feeling is not.

¨     Sadness.  Your full sense of loss will never occur all at once.  Weeks or often months pass before you are confronted with the depths of your sadness.  This slow progression is good.  You could not or should not tolerate all your sadness at once.  Your body, mind, and spirit need time working together to allow you to embrace the depth of your loss.  Be patient with yourself.



Myth #1  Grief and mourning are the same.  Grief is the composite of thoughts and feelings about a loss you experienced within yourself.  Mourning is the external expression of that grief.  Crying, talking about the person who died, celebrating special events are examples of mourning.  Healing begins when we mourn publicly in the presence of understanding and caring persons who will not judge you.


Myth #2  There are predictable stages to grief.  While grief often manifests itself in similar ways, and at times there is a logical progression of emotion, grief is not predictable.


Myth #3  We should avoid the painful parts of grieving.  Our society often encourages prematurely moving away from grief instead of towards it.  The result is too many bereaved people either grieve in isolation or even move away from their grief.  When you avoid the pain of grief, you avoid healing.  Instead, you must learn to slowly embrace the full force of this pain so someday you can again embrace happiness.


Myth #4  We should “get over” our grief as soon as possible.  Rather than using the term resolution or recovery, I prefer reconciliation.  This does not mean getting over your grief, it means growing through it.  With reconciliation - which may take weeks or years – you feel a renewed sense of energy and confidence, an ability to fully acknowledge the reality of the death and become reinvalued with the activities of living.



Need 1.  Acknowledge the reality of the death.


Need 2.  Move toward the pain of the loss.  Expressing your thoughts and feelings about the death with all their intensity is a difficult but important need.  Dose yourself little by little.  You should not try to meet this need all at once.


Need 3.  Continue the relationship with the person who died through memory.  Embracing your memories – both happy and sad – it can be a very slow and at times, painful process that occurs in small steps.  Remembering the past makes hoping for the future possible.


Need 4.  Develop a new self-identity.  Part of your self-identity comes from the relationships you have created with other people.  When someone with whom you have a relationship dies, your self-identity naturally changes.


Need 5.  Search for meaning.  We question the meaning and purpose of life especially at the death of a loved once.  Move at your own pace.


Need 6.  Continue to receive support from others.  You will never stop needing the love and support of others because you never “get over” your grief.  As you learn to reconcile your grief, you will need help less intensely and less often.


Grieving may be the hardest work you have ever done.  And hard work is less burdensome when others lend a hand.  Enclosed is a copy of the mourner’s Bill of Rights.  You may wish to share these pages with others.  Remember there is also Pastoral help available, and avail yourself of a new adult class beginning January  11th at 10:15 a.m.  We will use the Book of Ruth to discover some Biblical perspective about grief and mourning as we trace Ruth’s journey of faith.

New Children’s and Family Ministry

How can we get our children excited about coming to church?  How can we equip our families to be places of Christian education and spiritual nourishment?  How can our church come together to enjoy each other’s company and build quality relationships?


Try coming to a mid-week family program that will include something for the whole family and encourages singles to meet others.


Beginning Wednesday,  January 21st  we will provide the following for 10 weeks each Wednesday evening.


6:10pm Dinner for everyone…children and adults…families and singles

6:30pm-7:30pm Children’s Program called God’s Gifts

7:30pm-8:30pm Confirmation


We encourage all church organizations to try meeting for these ten weeks on this night.  Let’s make Wednesday Church night and have some precious time to have fellowship with one another.  The church council has made the decision to meet on Wednesday evenings, in part to support this night.  Come and meet the family of Carlton Hills.  It will also be a wonderful time to invite visitors.  Everyone is welcome.


What will the Children’s program be like?  God’s Gifts is a weekly lesson that is designed to be a take-home lesson that a parent or and adult friend or an older sibling can teach children K-6th grade.  When the lessons are returned the next week the children earn points for: answered questions, memorized Bible verses, a parent or adult friend signature, going to Sunday School or bringing a friend.  The points serve three purposes.

The points can be used in a “store” to purchase prizes and candy.  They can be contributed to a “World Hunger Jar” where the points worth 3 cents each will help the children of the world.  And all points earned and spent can be accumulated to have the child attend a trip at the end of the 10 week session.


Sound like fun?  It is!!


We do need help.  The confirmands are already volunteering to help but lots of help is needed.   The following help will be needed:  Provide a dinner, Provide prizes or candy for the God’s Gifts store, be a “listener” who listens to the children recite their Bible verses and records their points, provide a nursery for preschoolers during God’s Gifts, help run the God’s Gifts store, help the confirmands put on a puppet show to tell the lesson for the day, and maybe more categories of help will be needed.


Would like to consider helping?  Please come to a meeting on Wednesday, January 7th at 6:30pm for a volunteer training.  If you would like to help but cannot make the meeting please call Pastor Rick at 258-8775 or 249-3352.


A registration form for God’s Gifts will be included in the Sunday bulletin for the Sundays in January.  Please consider your participation prayerfully.

January Potluck!

The Tuesday Fellowship will be sponsoring a spaghetti potluck, on Sunday the 18th at 5pm in the Acts Center. Wine will be available by the glass at a small donation, and you can keep your glass.  The idea is to have pasta with a variety of sauce options, plus salad, bread, and dessert.  There will be a sign-up in the back of the church for those who are able to provide, however, we do not expect everyone to bring something.  We know many have busy schedules, all we ask is for the pleasure of your company.  Please feel no obligation to come bearing food, just come.  We’d love to see you there!


 The Dorcas Circle's first tea party was a "smashing" success.  There were sixteen ladies in attendance and we had a secret elf that joined us.

The Christmas Tea was held at Cobblestone Cottage Tea Shoppe in Alpine on Thursday, December 11th.  After dressing up in feather boas, large floppy hats, gloves, etc.(even our elf), we were served a scrumptious afternoon tea that consisted of scones, tea sandwiches, fruit, quiche and desserts.  There was a very large assortment of teas to choose from.  This should definitely become an annual event!

Our Sympathy to Rich Setzer who’s Foster mother passed recently.

Spotlight on Hymns

“We Three Kings  WOV #646

We three kings of Orient are, Bearing gifts we traverse afar
Field and fountain, moor and mountain
Following yonder star.


Lyrics by John Henry Hopkins Jr. (1820-1891)


     The Christmas carol "We Three Kings" tells the story of the Wise Men from the East who brought gifts to the baby Jesus. But who were the Three Kings, otherwise known as the Magi or Wise Men, and were they really royal?

     According to tradition dating back to medieval times, their names were Balthasar, Gaspar (or Casper), and Melchior. They are often depicted as representing the three races. The Bible says they came from the East, but exactly where is not known. Arabia, Babylon, and Persia are popular choices. According to one tradition, Balthasar was king of Arabia, Gaspar was king of India, and Melchior was king of Persia.

     An 8th century saint, Bede the Venerable, described the kings this way: "The first was called Melchior; he was an old man, with white hair and long beard; he offered gold to the Lord as to his king. The second, Gaspar by name, young, beardless, of ruddy hue, offered to Jesus his gift of incense, the homage due to Divinity. The third, of black complexion, with heavy beard, was called Baltasar; the myrrh he held in his hands prefigured the death of the Son of man."

     The Bible, however, does not describe the kings or reveal their names. In fact, it does not call them kings at all, but simply Magi, or Wise Men. The Magi were a Median (Kurdish) priestly caste who rose to power in ancient Persia (today's Iran). Their religion, Zoroastrianism, was founded around the 6th century BC by a Median man named Zoroaster. The Magi were held in awe as highly educated scientists and scholars who could interpret dreams and even control demons.

     The Magi of the Nativity were probably important men in their own country and may well have been of noble or royal birth, but there is no evidence to back this up. The idea that they were kings arose in the Middle Ages and was based on earlier Biblical prophecies about kings bearing gifts.

We can't even say for sure how many Magi visited Jesus. The Bible does not specify three. According to Eastern tradition, the number was 12. The Western tradition of three wise men probably arises from the three gifts they brought to Jesus.

     Tradition has it that in later years the Wise Men were baptized by St. Thomas the Apostle; all three became bishops and spent the rest of their lives spreading Christianity, and at the end of their lives they each saw the Star of Bethlehem again and were reunited. One legend says that they were over 100 years old when they met to celebrate Christmas, then died within a few days of each other.

     Their purported remains were brought to Constantinople by St. Helena, mother of the 4th century Roman emperor Constantine the Great, and later moved to Milan. In the 12th century they fell into the hands of Holy Roman emperor Frederick Barbarossa, who gave them to the Archbishop of Cologne, Germany. The archbishop built a cathedral for the relics in Cologne, where they remain to this day.

    The carol "We Three Kings" was written in 1857 by an American minister, John Henry Hopkins Jr., for use in a Christmas pageant, and it will be our opening hymn on January 11, the first Sunday after Epiphany.

As we move from Christmas to Epiphany…

     Lovers of carols and Christmas parties know that this season has 12 days, packed with golden rings, calling birds and various kinds of gentry, musicians and domestic workers. December 25 is Christmas - and 25 minus 12 does equal 13. Do the math and you will see why shopping malls, newspapers, television networks, and other cultural fortresses annually deliver some kind of "Twelve Days of Christmas" blitz, beginning on December 13.

     Problem is that for centuries church calendars in the East and the West have agreed that there are twelve days of Christmas and they begin on Christmas Day and end on January 6.

     The twelve days of Christmas end with the Feast of Epiphany also called "The Adoration of the Magi" or "The Manifestation of God." Celebrated on January 6, it is known as the day of the Three Kings (or wise men/magi). .

     January 6, the last day of Christmas, comes with its own traditions, rituals and symbols in some countries. Carolers are going from house to house; in many homes the Christmas tree is taken down and in some areas is burnt in a big bonfire. For the children this is an especially joyous occasion because, associated with taking down the tree goes the "plündern" (raiding) of the tree. The sweets, chocolate ornaments wrapped in foil or cookies, which have replaced the sugarplums, are the raiders' rewards.

     The history of Christmas, (the festival of the nativity of Jesus Christ,) is intertwined with that of the Epiphany. The commemoration of the Baptism (also called the Day of Lights, i.e. the Illumination of Jesus) was also known as the birthday of Jesus, because he was believed to have been born then of the Virgin or reborn in baptism. In some records Christmas and Epiphany were referred to as the first and second nativity; the second being Christ's manifestation to the world.

     In the fourth century, December 25 was finally adopted by the Western Christian Church as the date of the Feast of Christ's birth. It is believed that this change in date gave rise to the tradition of the "12 Days of Christmas." While the Western Christian Church celebrates December 25th, the Eastern Christian Church to this day recognizes January 6 as the celebration of the nativity. January 6 was also kept as the physical birthday in Bethlehem. In the Teutonic west, Epiphany became the Festival of the Three Kings (i.e. the Magi), or simply Twelfth day.

Ruth M. Reichmann

Worth Thinking about…

 God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts.

Dear God, I have a problem -- it's me.

Growing old is inevitable, growing UP is optional.

There is no key to happiness. The door is always open.

 Silence is often misinterpreted, but never misquoted.

Do the math ... count your blessings.

Faith is the ability to not panic.

Laugh every day, it's like inner jogging.

If you worry, you didn't pray. If you pray, don't worry.

As a child of God, prayer is kind of like calling home every day.

Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape.

The most important things in your home are the people.

When we get tangled up in our problems, be still. God wants us to be still so He can untangle the knot.

A grudge is a heavy thing to carry.

He who dies with the most toys is still dead.

We do not remember days, but moments.

Life is moving too fast, so enjoy your precious moments.

Nothing is real to you until you experience it, otherwise it's just hearsay.

It's all right to sit on your pity pot every now and again. Just remember to flush it occasionally!


Due to the passing of our beloved Pastor Mark, the ladies were very busy assisting at the pot luck following his memorial service.  We had a tremendous amount of support from local churches and friends to assist us.  The ladies of Dorcas send all their love and blessings to Jan, Erin and Andrew.

The annual Christmas Bazaar was a great success with many members of the congregation not only purchasing items, but also donating many items.

We thank all those who helped.

Officers were elected at our November meeting.  They are Marie Freeman, President/Charlotte Arthurton- Vice President/Grace Otto-Treasurer/ Deanna Sampson and Delores Reyden will share the responsibilities of Secretary.

Installation will be held at a worship service in January.

Our mission for next year is to assist the Santee Food Bank to collect non-perishable foods and cash to purchase meat, dairy products, etc.  You will see inserts in the bulletins in the coming months, and someone from the Food Bank will be addressing the congregation at a worship service soon.

We invite all ladies to join us.  Our next meeting is Wednesday, January 7th, 2004 at 7 p.m.

Council Highlights from December 15, 2003

After devotions, where all members shared what they considered their most important blessings, Pastor Frank counseled us about our loss of Pastor Mark, and the grief that will be with us for so long.

Pastor Frank and Pastor Rick informed us of their schedules and responsibilities.  This will begin as of January 1, 2004Pastor Frank will work from home on Mondays, be in the office from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.  He will be at church on Sunday mornings around 8 a.m. and leave around noonPastor Rick will be in the office Monday mornings from 9 a.m. till noon.  He will be working with our youth.  Look for more information in this newsletter.

The council feels we are blessed to have these two wonderful ministers to assist us in the every day affairs of our church.

We will be approaching members to serve on a Transition Team to begin the healing process we must all go through.  This team will be introduced at our Budget and Election Meeting that was postponed until January 4, 2004Pastor Gordon Peterson, from the synod, will meet with this team on January 14th.  He is trained in the transition phase, which we go through prior to the Calling Team.

Our annual congregational meeting will be held in February, with the definite date to be announced.

Offering envelopes are in for 2004.  We still need to have Consecration Sunday and the Ministry Fair, which were also postponed.  Please pray carefully about your pledges for the coming year. 

Council will have a meeting following church service on January 11th, and then our regular meeting on January 21st.

Respectfully submitted,

Marie E. Freeman

+++REMEMBER IN PRAYER those who are affected by anxiety, depression, guilt, grief, loneliness, poverty, illness and in need of God’s healing and loving touch:

Friends: Arnold, Glen, Kathy, Patty, Fred, Marsha, Helen

Members: Crystal & Rod Boisvert, Arlean Lane, Laura Kramer, Norie Feltner, Ralph Beyer, Joseph & Gertrude Geiler, Gunda Richardson, Grace Otto, Judy Johnston, Ed & Marge Whitehead, Elsie Erion, Linda Tomsick, Cole & Marie Freeman,  Betty Keehn, Charlotte Kimbrough, Marty Freer, Arnold Flurry, Jan, Erin, Andrew Neuhaus & family.

NOTE:  We currently have two prayer chains that can be easily activated by calling Mary Thomas, Prayer Chain Coordinator,  334-6457(note this is her new number).

v  SR. FELLOWSHIP meets at the Olive Garden Restaurant in Grossmont Center at 11;30 a.m., Tuesday, January 13th. Join in for some good food and wonderful fellowship. For more information call either Grace Otto, 448-9347 or Nancy Funick, 561-7823.


Grace Otto has a new address:
1228 Sumner Ave Apt 50
El Cajon, CA 92021


Texts for the Sundays in January:

Jan 4th/     2nd Sunday in Christmas

Jer 31:7-14, Eph 1:3-14, John 1:1-9

Jan 11th/   Baptism of Our Lord

Isa 60:1-6, Eph 3:1-12, Matt 2:1-12

Jan 18st/   Confession of St. Peter

Acts 4:8-13, 1 Cor 10:1-5, Matt 16:13-19

Jan 25th/   3rd Sunday after the Epiphany

Neh 8:1-3,5-6, 8-10, 1 Cor 12:12-31a, Luke 4:14-21

 We can use help in knowing who is in need of a thinking of you card. If you know of someone ill, having surgery or ??? please contact Betty Pendergast, Pastor, or call the church office

January Anniversaries

21/    Gilbert & Trudy Hanley

29/    Mavis & Richard Rones

30/    Jerold & Sherry Henson

January Birthdays

2/      Amanda Martin

6/      Michael Judd

7/      Robert Graef

9/      Shirley Garrett

9/      Karen Morrison

14/    Rod Boisvert

16/    Marian Privett

16/    Herb Ryden

17/    Kerri Kotch

17/    Joseph Lynch

18/    Pat Swanson

23/    Richard Haak

26/    Crysta Campbell

30/    Marcy Metz


Acolyte: 4/ Brian Meyers 11/ Ericka Davis 18/ Louie Quintanilla 25/ Anna Bloemen

Assist. Minister:  Leslie Atkins

Coffee Fellowship: 4/ Stephen Ministers 11/ 18/ 25 / Nancy Funick, Laura Vaughan, Janice Davis et. al.

Communion Assist.: Bill Thomas & George Montague

Communion Care: Bruce & Cheryl Potocki

Edgemoor Hospital Worship: (4th Sunday of ea. mo.) Jim Thomas

Greeters:  4/ 11/ Kim Naour & June Webb 18/ 25/ Jim Thomas & Florence Hustad

Lector: 4/ 11/ Joi Comstock

18/ 25/ Bruce Potocki

Nursery: TBA 

Sound: 4/ Nicole Vaughan

11/ 18/ 25/ TBA

Stephen Minister of the Day: 4/ Jim Thomas 11/ Bill Blue  18/ Carol Davidson 25/ Ellie Timan

Ushers: Laura & Nicole Vaughan, Kathleen Darland, Tom Davidson, Marie & Cole Freeman, Amanda Jones, Charlotte Kimbrough, Hannah & Molly Lisowsky and Jim Thomas.

The Mourner’s Bill of Rights


As a bereaved person, you have certain rights that others must not take away from you.  In fact, it is the very upholding of these rights that makes healing possible.


1.     You have the right to experience your own unique grief.

No one else will grieve in exactly the same way you do.  Don’t allow others to tell you what you should or should not be feeling.

2.     You have the right to talk about your grief.

Talking about your grief will help you heal.  Seek out others who will allow you to talk as much as you want, as often as you want, about your grief.

3.     You have the right to feel a multitude of emotions.

Confusion, disorientation, fear, guilt, and relief are just a few of the emotions you might feel as part of your grief journey.  Know that there is no such thing as a “wrong” emotion.  Accept all your feelings and find listeners who will do the same.

4.     You have the right to be tolerant of your physical and emotional limits.

Your feelings of loss and sadness will probably leave you feeling fatigued.  Respect what your body and mind are telling you.  Get daily rest.  Eat balanced meals.  And don’t allow others to push you into doing things you don’t feel ready to do.

5.     You have the right to experience grief “attacks.”

Sometimes, out of nowhere, a powerful surge of grief may overcome you.  This can be frightening, but is normal and natural.  Find someone who understands and will let you talk it out.

6.     You have the right to make use of ritual.

The funeral ritual provides you with the support of caring people.  More important, it supportively sees you off on your painful but necessary grief journey.  Later rituals, such as lighting a candle for the person who died, can also be healing touchstones.  If others tell you that rituals such as these are silly of unnecessary, don’t listen.

7.     You have the right to embrace your spirituality.

If faith is a part of your life, express it in ways that seem appropriate to you.  Allow yourself to be around people who understand and support your religious beliefs.  If you feel angry at God, find someone to talk with who won’t be critical of your feelings of hurt and abandonment.

8.     You have the right to search for meaning.

You may find yourself asking, “Why did he or she die?  Why this way?  Why now?”  Some of your questions may have answers but some may not.  And watch out for the clichéd responses some people may give you.  Comments like, “It was God’s will” of “think of what you have to be thankful for” are not helpful and you do not have to accept them.

9.      You have the right to treasure your memories.

Memories are one of the best legacies that exist after the death of someone loved.  You will always remember.  Instead of ignoring your memories, find creative ways to embrace them.

10.You have the right to move toward your grief and heal.

Reconciling your grief will not happen quickly.  Remember, grief is a process, not an event.  Be patient and tolerant with yourself and avoid people who are impatient and intolerant with you.  Neither you nor those around you must forget that the death of someone loved changes your life forever.